I'm just a few weeks away from being 50 years old. I have always associated 50 with being 'old'. Not sure if I thought I would shrivel up and die when I was 50, or if I would need a nursing home at 50 or what... I just thought 50 was old.
So I'm close to that age & surprise (to me!) I don't feel old. I am looking forward to being a grandmother to A's girlfriend's baby girl. I'm praying that the Js conceive soon. My life isn't what it thought it would be at this age, but my life is good.
D and I are good together now. We are sharing my house and making it our home. We are working in overdrive to get things spiffed up for my birthday. He is painting and cleaning. And he is cutting the grass to perfect percision - which I don't think hs is doing that for me... he is simply trying to outdo the neighbors - LOL.
He has never gotten a job that paid as much as before he got laid off and that still upsets him terribly. But he works. He goes where they tell him & do what they say. Every day is a lesson in humility to such a proud man.
And I am employing "am I being reasonable" to when I'm annoyed before I say anything. Most times, I'm not being reasonable so I keep quiet & chalk it up to the fact that other than my ex, I've never lived with anyone before, so maybe some of the quirks are just part of living in the same house as someone else (other than children).
He is employing the "not such a big deal" strategy - LOL. When he would normally complain for 20 minutes about something minuscule that is out of his control, he now says his pieces in 20 seconds and then says "Well I'm just not going to let it bother me". The other day I commented on how wonderful that was & he informed me that he had to change because it was effecting his health. Well I have to admit that I wished he would have said he is trying to change for me, but of well, I'll still take the results!
We are a couple. We are not married, nor do we ever talk about it. We are 2 people in a committed relationship and it feels good.
So I'm close to that age & surprise (to me!) I don't feel old. I am looking forward to being a grandmother to A's girlfriend's baby girl. I'm praying that the Js conceive soon. My life isn't what it thought it would be at this age, but my life is good.
D and I are good together now. We are sharing my house and making it our home. We are working in overdrive to get things spiffed up for my birthday. He is painting and cleaning. And he is cutting the grass to perfect percision - which I don't think hs is doing that for me... he is simply trying to outdo the neighbors - LOL.
He has never gotten a job that paid as much as before he got laid off and that still upsets him terribly. But he works. He goes where they tell him & do what they say. Every day is a lesson in humility to such a proud man.
And I am employing "am I being reasonable" to when I'm annoyed before I say anything. Most times, I'm not being reasonable so I keep quiet & chalk it up to the fact that other than my ex, I've never lived with anyone before, so maybe some of the quirks are just part of living in the same house as someone else (other than children).
He is employing the "not such a big deal" strategy - LOL. When he would normally complain for 20 minutes about something minuscule that is out of his control, he now says his pieces in 20 seconds and then says "Well I'm just not going to let it bother me". The other day I commented on how wonderful that was & he informed me that he had to change because it was effecting his health. Well I have to admit that I wished he would have said he is trying to change for me, but of well, I'll still take the results!
We are a couple. We are not married, nor do we ever talk about it. We are 2 people in a committed relationship and it feels good.
